OCTOBER 13, 2019.
Here we are on the day of the Hunter’s Full Moon and I’m truly blessed.
I thought of a dozen ways I could open my journal entry this morning. For truly there has already been a lot that has taken place. I guess though, it would be best to start at the beginning of the day and tell the entire story. To me it seems the best way to put whomever may read this into the whole of it.
My day began at just a moment or two after 6:00. We’d slept with the windows open and what a glorious sleep it was. I’d only awakened once to go to the bathroom sometime in the night and though the flu seemed to be lingering still, I felt as though I’d rested well.
“I’m still so weak Bubba.” I said sliding out of the warmth of the covers. “Mommy doesn’t think this doggoned stuff is ever going away.” Campbell turned onto his side, stretched and let out a long deep moan as if to say, “I hate it for you, but what’s a dog got to do to get a little more shuteye round here?”
Giving him a loving pat I put my feet firmly onto the floor, took several deep breaths of the crisp morning air to clear the cobwebs out and levering up off the mattress began making my way toward the bathroom and the beginning of the day.
Later as I stood in front of the kitchen counter readying to open the last coffee pod in the pack I announced to the air, “Well, I might be making my last cup of coffee until tomorrow when I can get to the store but by golly I got my phone bill paid and didn’t have to borrow money to do it.”
Sometime during yesterday afternoon it dawned on me that I had a client who paid me monthly and that I could easily ask him to pay a week or so early. He’d told me I could plenty of times before so, I’d gathered up my courage, and written asking if he could pay a week early, and if he wouldn’t mind going ahead and paying $20 on the next month. I’d explained the issue, and then, not knowing for sure when he’d answer due to his being in a different time zone than me went on with my day. Just as earlier that morning, I was assured that all would be well.
Sure enough, sometime later I found an email from him saying that he’d be glad to pay me and that he’d just sent me the payment for October and November, had thanked me for my work and that was that.
I’d stopped everything, paid the bill and now, here I was making my last cup of coffee and had no worries at all.
But just when I thought the day might actually get off to a totally struggle free start BLAM…!
“Oh! No! That’s the last of the coffee! NOOOO!” I shouted in despair. “Why on earth?”
Somehow as I’d been pouring the coffee from the pod into the little basket the grounds went into I’d dropped the basket and coffee grounds were now scattered all across the counter.
“Damn it! I am not going to have this!” I demanded. “You hear me? I’ll have this coffee and right the hell now!”
Reaching into the cabinet I took down a small bowl. Then, holding my breath so not to blow them away, I very carefully scooped every last ground of coffee into it, and then even more carefully poured them back into the little basket. Letting out my breath in a victorious whoosh I declared triumphantly, “There, now. Got them back in there.”. “I’ll not be defeated today. Not today. I’m going to have a good morning and that is that.”
Sliding the little basket into the coffeepot I chanted, “There is no part of my body which does not belong to the Goddess. There is no part of my life which does not belong to the Goddess. I am she, and she is me. We are one, yet we are we.” And as the coffee began dripping into the cup and I wiped up the little bit of spilled water from where I’d poured water into the reservoir in the back of the pot the scent of strong coffee began to fill the air.
Now here I am just draining the last wonderful sips of coffee from the cup and how very good it was. I care not one whit for the fact that I’ve no more coffee for the day. Honestly, I believe if I use a slightly smaller amount of water, there might be another cup in those grounds. As I sit here contemplating this thought I think again of how much stuff people waste. That old saying of, “waste not, want not” is true and I’ve found it serves me well all the time. I cannot allow myself to think or live any other way. If I do I’ll fail. I’ll fall into depression and once you let that crap start you’re sunk. I just have to keep remembering, “one step at a time. One now at a time. One breath at a time.” If I do that I will absolutely be victorious.” Now, just before sunrise I pray…
“Thank you Goddess for the sun.
Thank you now the day’s begun, all our needs, wants, and desires they’re met.
Thank you for what we have and have not yet.
Thank you when the day is through, we will still be we and you will still be you.
Light our path. Guide our way. Give us what to do and say.
So Mote It Be. Blessid Be. Amen.
Campbell and I have just come in and gotten settled after our morning walk. When we went out the sun hadn’t yet risen, and I was in my PJS and robe, so we stayed in the yard. But, I let Campbell take his time and enjoy all the smells of the morning. He did his business quickly and the rest of the 20 minutes or so we wondered round the yard were spent with him sniffing slowly along and me saying my morning prayers.
Once back inside, I scooped out his breakfast kibble, mixed in his morning medication and sitting it before him released him from rest and while he was busy inhaling it down I went and refilled his water bowl. After putting his refilled water bowl down beside him, I decided while he was licking the bowl to make certain he’d not missed anything I’d go back into the kitchen to see what I might do about a second cup of coffee.
I stood in front of the kitchen counter and in my mind’s eye I visualized a big steaming cup of fresh strong coffee, and then set about my work. I filled the cup with water, and poured it into the reservoir in the back of the coffeepot. Then just as I was slipping the cup underneath the drip, readying to turn it on I suddenly had a flash of memory. “Seems to me there’s a coffee can in the back of the freezer. Didn’t I save a few grounds once?” I asked myself as I left the pot and hurried to open the freezer door. Sure enough there in the back corner of the freezer there was a coffee can and when I pulled it out I found there was a good half-scoop of grounds rattling round in the bottom. “Praise be!” I shouted triumphantly! “Yes! Waste not, want not works again!”
Shutting the door with a hearty whack I went back to my pot, slid the little basket of leftover grounds out, and very carefully poured in the half-scoop of grounds. Sliding the basket back into place I pressed the on button and as the coffee began to drip into the cup once again I chanted…
“There is no part of my body which does not belong to the Goddess. There is no part of my life which does not belong to the Goddess. I am she, and she is me. We are one, yet we are we.”
Now here I sit sipping my second cup of coffee of the day and I am rejoicing. Lots of people would say, “But it shouldn’t be so hard.” Others would ask, “How can you be so positive through all your struggle?” I have to answer, “Because I get the joy of testifying of the creator’s greatness, and what better reason for joy!”
I’m not going to sit here and tell you that I don’t get overwhelmed with a flood of despair every now and then. I won’t say that there aren’t mornings when I sit in the floor, hold Bubba Dog in my arms and cry tears of deep exhaustion into his beautiful, thick, welcoming fur. I will not lie to you and say that what I go through is as easy as I sometimes make it sound. What I will say is that on this morning there is true joy in my heart, and I promised goddess that if she would take care of me, would provide for me no matter what that I would use my gift of writing to testify to her goodness. I promised that I would in some small way show people that my way of faith is as valid as theirs. I promised that if she would allow me to have that which I needed to make it through each day being fed, clothed, and sheltered that I would work to bridge the gaps between those who would cast out ones who are different from them. I gave my word, and so here I am happily telling my story.
Some choose to keep things of a personal nature such as the story I’ve told here to themselves. That is alright for them. Their calling is different than mine. I choose to proclaim my faith. To tell all who would listen that the creator, whatever you call him her is real and right here waiting for them to surrender themselves to their power and allow the blessings to flow. Now, as the geese fly over in a big loud honking gaggle, again I pray…
“Thank you Goddess for the sun.
Thank you now day’s begun, all our needs, our wants, our desires they’re met.
Thank you for what we have and have not yet.
Thank you when the day is through we will still be we and you will still be you.
Light our path. Guide our way.
Give us that which to do and say.
So Mote It Be! Blessid Be. Amen.”
This story is brought to you by Ernest Dempsey. Please see his information below. If you visit his blog or buy his published work, please be sure to let him know from where you heard of him.
Thank you for reading. May harmony find you, and blessid be.
Author, editor, citizen journalist, blogger, and human and animal rights advocate, Ernest Dempsey has seen his writing appearing in print and online worldwide. A vegetarian and advocate for peace and justice, Dempsey moves forward with his passion for the written word. Visit his website http://www.ernestdempsey.com.