Today has been one of those this and that days for me.
I started out at just after 7 AM trying to talk myself into having a good day. Tried to tell myself I didn’t feel bad, I could and would get up and take Campbell for a walk, and believe it or not, I succeeded.
I didn’t just get up and pretend to feel better. Well, I did at first, but as I got going, it became reality.
Later while getting ready to go out to the store I asked myself, “so, did you, do you really feel better, or are you pretending?”
Answer, “I really feel better. I do.”
When I returned home with my plunder from the store, and was greeted at the door by a big, wiggling, wagging beast, I saw that Campbell was feeling better too.
These days he gets a slow start to the day, but he puts me in mind of a windup toy, cause once you get him going, he’s gone.
I went inside, sat my groceries down, made a mad-dash to the bathroom, and then Campbell and I were off for our late morning, early afternoon walk.
He sniffed alongside the fences where other dogs lived, reading the Daily Doggy. He dug in piles of leaves that had been raked into the verge between the sidewalk and street, and he even dug a hole beside the corner down from our house, he was loving life as never before, discovering things he’d never done before, or at least not in a very long time.
Back at the house, I listened to a podcast on writing while I put away my groceries, loaded the dishwasher, and put some lunch in the oven.
Then I spent time catching up on Facebook, Twitter, and WordPress, as well as reading mail.
“What the heck? Lunch is done, and it’s nearly time to take the beast for another walk.”
Eating lunch I was amazed to find it was more like early supper, it was quite literally 3 in the afternoon.
“What on earth?” I asked the air, “Where did the day go? Seemed like just a minute ago I was waking up and feeling like a train wreck, and then, everything happened.”
Now, here I am at the end of another day, I don’t feel like I got a whole lot done, and part of that is because I didn’t. Part of that is because of tech junk I cannot yet help, and part of it is because, “Everything happened.”
One thing I noted as I went through my day, everything I encountered seemed to have the same theme. It seemed to me everything I listened to, read, or talked about with others hinged on people being stopped by their fears, and the limitations they put on themselves, and I thought…
“What would’ve happened had I given into the thought I had when I first woke? What would’ve happened had I believed that I felt horrible, and that I couldn’t possibly get up and do anything today?”
But, I did not believe that false voice, I did not give into the fear I had of going out without Campbell. I did not give into that feeling that everything was wrong. I went passed that, faced my fear, and walked onward, and, “everything happened.”
I made some decisions about my writing today, and I think sometimes that’s the most important part of the writing process.
Today I decided I was going to walk passed what I consider my limits. I’m going to put aside the worry I have about what this or that person might think if I write specific things in my works, and I’m going to go with my desire to tell my stories the best way I know, and with as much bravery as I can find, and I’m gonna love it.
I’m finally going to come out from behind rock inhibition and I’m going to finish my Blended Lives Chronicles, and I’m going to publish it.
I’m going to write and publish my Campbell’s Rambles Trilogy, and I’m going to stand tall believe in my writing ability, and I’m going to love it.
I’m going to make, “Everything happen.”